Andy's Blog

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It’s time to light the lights
It’s time to meet the Muppets on the Muppet Show tonight.

There is something very comforting when you fully embrace your inner ‘Muppetness’, a realisation that sometimes it takes WAY too much time and effort to be miserable and that life really shouldn’t be taken THAT seriously anyway!

The shedding of some expectations has lifted a huge weight from me and in large respects has made me go; “what the fff…lipping heck were you thinking anyway?!”.  Other issues still need to be resolved, but those I will face in typical muppet fashion… minus some singing and dancing… and chickens (maybe).

So, I am embracing my muppetness and choosing appropriate characters based on my mood for the day.  So watch out for Kermit, Fozzy Bear, Beaker and more importantly Animal!

Until then I am practising my “Mr Boombastic” routine ready for the christmas party discos – so beware!

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I am not sure if it’s either my mood attaching particular meanings to tracks, or the album just connecting with my particular mood; but whichever way it is I am finding that Nickelback’s “All The Right Reasons” is hitting all the right spots for me personally.

The last few weeks have been a bit up and down and, as suggested within previous posts, some realisations bringing a more ‘calm’ me; Why worry about something over which you have no control?

This album hasn’t been off my iPhone for a few weeks or more, usually at a ridiculously loud volume, and particular tracks ‘seeming’ to chart my mood at a particular time over those weeks.  These being, in chronological order;

• Far away
• Next contestant
• Photograph
• Animals

There is always a danger of reading too much into this selection and not understanding the context into which these fit… but, and I have to admit to not understanding the *actual* meaning behind some of the songs, I think, as most people do, I just keyed on a particular sentiment or verse and attached my own feeling to it and made it make sense to my own situation.

That said, my current mood music “Animals” is just a pure grin-like-an-idiot, wind the amp upto 11 and do the same on my new plaything;  A Kawasaki ZX-6R!  

600cc’s of diablo black fun, with a top speed of 168mph, 0-60mph in less time than it takes to blink (or hit the back of the car in front) and me sat on it grinning inside the helmet to match the grinning demon’s face painted on the outside.  I am one VERY happy troozers!

So if you see me wandering around with the earphones in, you’ll know what I’m listening to, and if you don’t see me – I’m the screaming black demon that just whizzed by..

I find myself in a strange mood today, certainly not unhappy, but bouncing somewhere between the two moods in the title.  A good morning has been had, Coffee with friends is always refreshing, despite my yawning and nearly hitting my head on the table for a quick snooze.

This has been a pretty full on week, what with late nights and the culmination of 8 hours of karate being completed over these past 7 days; shocking to think that’s equivalent to a full working day – and still more to come!

..and the reason for the mood?  Just the quiet realisation, slowly come to, that some things weren’t to be and the sadness felt when you finally fully accept that fact.  Also strangely liberating as well, it makes for a more relaxed interaction with people and, probably more importantly, with yourself.

Melancholic or merely wistful?  I’ll let you decide…

Remembrance Sunday is a tough one for me, what with my ‘coming out’ as a full blown atheist being in conflict with my desire to take part in the rememberance ceremony which is usually always a church related activity.  Having just come back from a service I find that my Atheism is somewhat more cemented than it was, but then again so is my desire to remember the fallen.

Many years ago, when my Sister and I were still fairly small children, my parents used to ship us off to Sheringham, on the Norfolk coast, to stay with our Grandparents for a couple of weeks during the Summer.  This was probably more to let our Parents have a break rather than allow us to have a chance to play on the beach.

I do remember one grey day, being alone in the living room, watching some 1950′s war film about the landings in Sicily and, as 10 year olds usually do, getting all excited about the shooting and heroic charging up hills, etc.  It wasn’t until a voice behind me said “It wasn’t like that”, that I noticed my Grandad sadly looking at the film from the doorway.

Usually when my Grandad told stories, it was about Buses or Coaches and usually resulted in us Grandchildren deperately looking for escape routes.  However that morning my Grandad told me about the realities of War, about the scared young men having to do things which still haunted, those that survived, a lifetime later, and about those that never came back and having to witness what that entailed; usually not the clean wound through the heart and a sigh.

I never really heard my Grandad speak about the war before that, or really very much after that.  I think I was just lucky enough to be there when a memory was stirred, of his time within that campaign, and a desire to ensure that their sacrifices were not forgotten and more importantly not sanitised.

My Grandad died not so long ago and, as I did at my  paternal Grandad’s funeral, I wept as the Last Post was played at his funeral.  I still weep as I hear that lament, and I did again as it was played at todays Remembrance Service.  However this time I felt slightly less self conscious about it when I noticed the young paratrooper in front of me also wiping tears away.

I think it right that my lack of belief takes a large step backwards to honour those that had a larger belief; that what they were doing was right and would protect those that they love.  It is, after all, the ultimate sacrifice and should be remembered by us all.

Sometimes you think you have the measure of something and understand the framework in which to interact within there.  This process usually has hiccups along the way, but those generally help develop that ‘framework’.

Every so often, however, things happen, or are said, which make you go “what the….?”, and question whether that framework is entirely correct.  Ah well, time to stumble along as usual and wonder whether you are reading too much into something that is probably nothing.

Usual story

Sometimes, as tempting as an offer is, inviting yet more disappointment is not something I want to have to deal with at the moment.  I have a plateful at the moment so will sit and watch from the sidelines and ponder what never was.

..in a zen like, contemplative, manner of course.

Here’s the simple, in four easy steps, troozers method for sorting out your work inbox after a week or more away from work.  This method was tested yesterday after my own break from the daily grind and is guaranteed to work in less than a minute… and I won’t even charge you for this foolproof method;

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As has been previously mentioned on this blog I am an Internet Junkie, my ‘Geek’ credentials having been admitted to on many an occassion, and proudly too dammit!

Therefore, when my Internet connection is rudely yanked from underneath my feet, which seems to be the case again with O2 and it’s increasingly flakey 3G service, I start getting the DT’s.  So many things to see out there, what with my rejoining the facebook and MSN world again (thanks to what could only be called a viciously blunt pep talk from a unforgiving Glaswegian friend of mine), and me unable to participate!

The iPhone is good, with some limitations, but the O2 service seems not to quite live up to the device.  Time to shout at some Customer Services personnel methinks, and continue the ancient art of SMS’ing some friends whilst I wait for normal service to resume.